Compulsions (Sex & Love)
While the recovery process is different for each sexual compulsion there are some themes. Recovery typically involves the following four categories: 1) Detoxing; 2) De-traumatizing; 3) Centering & Healing; and 4) Sexual Health. We define Detoxing as stopping the behavior and learning to tolerate the uncomfortable feelings: boredom, discomfort, anxiety, emptiness, pain, and sadness. De-traumatizing is best understood as identifying and exploring past events that have contributed to the uncomfortable feelings that the sexual compulsion masks. Centering and Healing refers to learning to be comfortable with self and identifying new coping mechanisms to reduce negative feelings. Sexual Health is defined as learning ways in which to express one’s own sexuality. Full recovery is not celibacy, but rather developing the skill set needed to be sexually intimate with self and others. Lastly, if you are the partner of a love or sex compulsion keep reading because there are many tips that are written specifically for you!