1. Embrace the Excitement & Prepare Together for Back to School Transitions
Back to school shopping: Most schools will require their students to come prepared with specific school supplies and materials. Involve your kids by doing a scavenger hunt for the new materials, whether it be in the house, or at 5 below! By involving them, and giving your student autonomy in their supplies for the year, will result in them feeling more enthusiastic about organization and doing work. Stick to a budget, but if you can, allowing your kid to choose a themed folder or pencil, instead of the standard supplies, could create a strong association with a positive memory!
Visual Calendar: Use a monthly, weekly, or even daily calendar (if you can do all three, that is amazing). Having this organizational tool will not only help you know what's coming, but your child will know what to plan for as well. Visual calendars are especially beneficial if your child thrives on structure, predictability, and organization. Making the calendar something fun with erasable markers, or velcro icons, will encourage your child to engage in the planning process too!
2. Establish a Schedule & Create Predictability for Back to School Transitions
Ease into your new flow: A few days or weeks before school starts, test out your routine! Will your child be walking, taking the bus, or driving to school? Play pretend with them and do a trial run. This will help your family adjust to the wake up times, commute, and dare I say “rush” of a real school morning. Remember to stay in a calm state while doing test runs, your child might be more anxious than you in these anticipatory moments and seeing a caretaker calm will help them to regulate.
3. Stay Empathetic & Compassionate
Checking in Authentically: This is a great time to check in with your child and stay curious as to how they are doing. Acknowledge their struggles, offer reassurance, and help them cope with the emotional challenges of back-to-school transitions. Ask them who they’re excited to see, what they want to learn, etc. Always end on a positive note and remind them of all their strengths and amazing qualities to fill them up with confidence going into a new year! Continue to regularly check in with your kids to see how they’re adjusting, both academically and emotionally. Open communication strengthens your bond and makes problem-solving easier. This also creates a nice foundation for communication as your child levels up into teen years. You don’t want to push your child to share what they are not ready to open up about, but letting them know you’re there for the happy and sad, is often enough.
4. Build a Supportive Community
Parent Connections: Reach out to other parents, even if it’s just to share experiences or offer support. You don’t need to be best friends, but having a network can be invaluable during the school year. Reach out to them and arrange playdates either before the semester starts, or early on in the year. Even if your child doesn't know someone directly in their classroom, or at their lunch table, having the reassurance that they do have a friend will support them in feeling socially secure. Look for local or online groups of like-minded parents who can offer advice, emotional support, or just a listening ear.
5. Release the Pressure to Be Perfect
Manage your Expectations: Back-to-school transitions are rarely flawless. It’s okay if things don’t go exactly as planned—perfection is not the goal. Be gentle with yourself and especially your kiddo as you navigate this shift. You’re doing your best, and that’s enough. In the long run, your child won’t remember if you miss a day or two of those amazing Pinterest board-themed lunches!
6. Ground Yourself During Chaotic Moments
Grounding: When things feel overwhelming, take a moment to pause and take a few deep breaths to recenter yourself. If deep breathing isn't your thing, name everything you see in the room that is blue, or give your body a good shake and a stretch. When you’re grounded, you're going to be able to use the part of your brain that can make rational decisions, rather than the part that is run by impulse or emotions.
But Also, Embrace the Chaos: Accept that not everything will go smoothly, and that’s okay. Laugh at the mess, savor the moments of chaos, and know that each day offers a new beginning for the family. And always remember “Your child is not giving you a hard time, they are having a hard time.”
7. Tantrums, Meltdowns, and Shutdowns, Oh My!
What's the difference: Tantrums, meltdowns, and shutdowns each have their unique characteristics. Tantrums are when there is an end goal in mind. The person having a tantrum likely did not get their way or perhaps wants something. Their emotions are big, in overdrive, and yet still valid! Help your tantrum-er regulate through modeling and then have a conversation with them. Meltdowns are concerning sensory stimuli and can be common for those who are neurodivergent. For example, if your kiddo is somewhere noisy, bright, or fragranced, it might be too much for them to handle at that moment. Remove them from the stimuli and model deep breathing until they too, can regulate. Shutdowns are when the kiddo is unresponsive, this is not the right time to have a conversation. You may see them have trouble speaking or moving. This will pass and again, give your child time to regulate before having a conversation.
8. Get Back to The Basics by Prioritizing Mental and Physical Health
Balanced Schedule: Incorporate time for relaxation and play. Your child, like you, needs moments to recharge amid school activities. Take a look at their schedule with a critical eye- what can you do to make this manageable and sustainable for both of you? Is homework taking a longer time than expected? Schedule a few days of the week where that is the only task that needs energy exerted.
Sleep, Hydrate, Eat, Exercise: These are maybe the most obvious, but oftentimes the most difficult piece of the routine to establish. A car can't run on no gas, and it runs even better when the gas is of quality! Set a consistent bedtime routine to ensure that everyone is well-rested, making mornings smoother and more manageable. Eat as many whole-natural foods as possible. Fast food and frozen meals are fine!! Try your best to make sure the meals are balanced and add whole ingredients to what you already have when you are on the go. Having your kiddo’s favorite fruits and veggies on hand as a side dish is always helpful. WATER! WATER! WATER! Hydration is so important and often the last priority when on the go. We need that coffee, right? When you're brushing your teeth, try implementing a class of water before other liquid consumption. If your child thinks water is boring, there are some great water flavoring packets you can add to their water bottle. And lastly exercise, but not just exercise, joyful movement! Move your body in a way that is refreshing and feels good. Not just when you're rushing from place to place.
Family Care: Self-care is a hot buzzword these days, but that is not for no reason. Schedule some “me time”, “you time”, and “we time”. “Me time” is your self-care which unfortunately is many times the last of priorities. Self-care looks different for everyone so be sure to aim to do something enjoyable for you (ex. Singing songs from exclusively the 90’s, watching reality TV in a robe, YouTube movement videos, skin care routine, etc). “You time” is that one on one bonding. If you have multiple children or a partner, spend time with them individually. It's important to remind them they have a friend in their caretaker. If you have a partner, block out time for yourselves as well. During periods of adjustment, it is normal to find yourself more irritable than your baseline. Having dedicated “you time” resets the meter to interact in a space with no external pressures. Examples of “you time” with the kids could be going to get ice cream, playing with toys, or hide and go seek. A good way to tell that you are doing something enjoyable versus doing something you think you should do, is tuning in to yourself before, during, and after the activity. Were you feeling dread or excitement beforehand? During the activity did it go by fast or drag on? Afterward, did you feel depleted of energy or satisfied with the activity? With multiple people being involved, do this check-in as a group and make changes where possible for next time!
By working together, supporting each other, and embracing the unpredictability of life, you and your kids can make the back to school transitions smooth and even enjoyable.
